Well, I just had a lovely little cry-fest. Well, I speak as if it's in the past, it's actually now too. You know, cuz I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life. Well, I do have an idea but I can't do anything with stuff that I'm interested in, so basically I get to cry about it. Yeehaw. Here's an idea, I'll be a professional student like Da said and then die before I have to pay the loans back, leaving that issue to my family. Stupid life, give me my cave and I'll be the happiest person you'll ever meet. Instead we have to get caught up the whole "must get a good job so I can have a good life" thing. It's pure bull. Seriously, if I can find a cave that's not pretected by some group or another, I will live in it. I don't care if I never see anything modern again, 'cept my modern successful buddies of course. I mean, come on, give me a cave with a nearby stream and surrounded by mountains or hills, what a life I could have! I could fend for myself and use my free time to run around, go swimming, sleep under the stars. Never have to hear about all the crap going on in the world, never have to deal with shallow people again (unless of course you're a shallow buddy ;)), never have to stress out over crap that shoudln't matter again. That is my dream. If I have to give up on all the others, that's the one I'll keep. Even if I can't have my super wonderful guy, I think maybe I'll just give up on that one right now actually. And you know what? If I can't see people, I can't be jealous of them either and I must say, I am a very jealous person and if I ever get mad at you it's most likely because I'm jealous of you and not because you actually did anything wrong. It's very annoying and extremely painful, that would be the main reason of my depression right there. So, if I could just change myself, it'd be all good. Well, mom has just reminded me that I should be doing homework. Goodbye my friends. I love you all and I require hugs right now, even if they are simulated hugs created by me. That's pitiful, why don't I just go for a walk and ask the first stranger I come across for a hug? It'd have about the same effect (that being none). Anyway, I'm gonna stop this lovely depression partay now. Have a good day y'alls. Goin' bridesmaid dress shopping again tomoz, so have a good time doing stuff. :)